Skip to main content

Happy with oneself?

Mary J. Blige new album is really good. I have been listening to "Work That", a song on that album. There is a line in that song that has been in my head for several days.

"They'll never be happy because they're not happy with themselves"

This phrase can apply to so many different situations and people. We have all had people, friends, co-workers and family members who could not (or should I say would not) be happy for others. I have been in this situation, on both sides.

Like many of you I have had times in my life where I was not happy with who I was. Some of those times I didn't even know it! One time that I specifically remember was Valentine’s Day 2006. I was working in corporate America, which I hated with a passion, and everyone around me were celebrating love. Women received flowers, candy, cards and balloons that covered their desk. One even got a singing telegram. I remember sitting at my desk truly hating because my “relationship” was not going anywhere and I knew it. Which also meant, that I knew I was not getting anything for Valentine’s day.

I look back on that day and see that my situation did not mean I couldn’t be happy for those who had good relationships. I realize now that I was unhappy with my job and other things in my life. These things hid my rose colored glasses. I saw everything from my unhappy and pitiful space.

I realize now I did not have to be that way! I now know that I can and should be happy for people around me. That sharing in their joy is a privilege and I should be happy to share in it. Also that when I do not have anything happy to say I should not say or show it!

I know that when I am unhappy with a part of my life, it is not my whole life! There are other things that are good, even when I may not see it or recognize it. Things could be worse and I need to be grateful for what I have. I have been working on this, looking for the positive. This in addition to using the techniques from the Secret, I feel my outlook is different. My evolution is continuing thank God!

So for those of you who are faces the challenge of dealing with people who are not happy for you. Think about the possibility that they are a hater! LOL That they may just be in the middle of a funk and not able to have happiness for others. Try to be understanding, but at the same time do not allow them to hinder your joy! Say a prayer for them and keep yourself grounded in the fact that at one time you might have been where they are.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Wedding Industry

Today while chatting with my girls we began discussing the wedding industry. The hoopla and money associate with a wedding. During this conversation I stated that how happy I am I didn’t stick with the original budget we had for our wedding. How I would be mad if I had spent that much now that I am married. Some times I feel like I am anti-weddings. It might be from being on The Knot (TK) since this past July. Or seeing couples, especially the women, put so much work, time and focus into their wedding and its over in a snap! Some spend a year or more planning their wedding. Researching, looking, buying and stressing over every detail of it and the day is over before you know it. I am NOT saying don’t do what YOU want, but do NOT get caught up in the hype! I mean seriously, would you put this much time in planning a party? A get together? A retirement party? Nope... so why your wedding? It's technically a party. It is a celebration of your union. Definition of wedding (1) a marriage

Inappropriate Questions

I am the queen of asking questions. I ask because I rather ask than assume, but I try not to ask inappropriate questions. If only others would do so too! Here are some I get and/or hear. “What grade are you in?” Um stupid motherf’er I am GROWN! Notice the diamonds on my left hand and my wedding band. The nice business casual clothes! This is a question I get atleast once a month from some random stupid person that don’t know me and they usually get a rude response. I mean if you are observant enough to look at me and think I’m that young you need to really be observant! And I’m a sistah, yes with a H! Yall know black don’t crack! “When are you due?” This one always makes me laugh when someone ask a woman who has a muffin top stomach and is NOT pregnant! I know it’s funny to me since I don’t get that question, but still how ignorant is that! “When are you having kids?” Um lets see, never! Why are you all in our sex life? I mean really! I am going to start saying, “We

The New Yorker Cover

I was not going to address the New Yorker’s broadly publicized cover, but since it’s all over the place I will! It portrays Democratic presidential candidate, Barack Obama, in a Muslim outfit and his wife, Michelle Obama, in a militant outfit. When I first say the cover on theybf I was very upset. I understand freedom of speech but wow! It seemed like a blatant attack on Obama’s campaign to me! I was appalled at how they put it up, on the cover of all places. Then to have the audacity to call it satire! I know it was sarcasm, but just like some jokes, it did not come across well. Atleast to me! I spent some of time on Monday and Tuesday reading responses and explanations to the cover. I was not as upset after reading some of them. Others made me want to scream. Tuesday, Obama was on Larry King Live. I really enjoyed this interview. At the beginning Larry King asked Obama what he made of the cover. His response: “Well, I know it was the "New Yorker's" attempt at satire. I